NFL Wildcard Weekend: Lets Fix Those Quirky Rules

Three non-contests in the 4th quarter and our first overtime game in the “new rules” era. So what have we got?

• The Houston Texans — behind their unheralded defense and a rookie quarterback — bested the Cincinnati Bengals (playoff winless since the first Bush took office) and their seriously-playing-not-to-lose (and failing) head coach, his tough defense, and its own rookie quarterback.
• The New Orleans Saints out-gunned and the up-and-coming Detroit Lions, pulling away in the second half of their Saturday night affair.
• The New York Giants — especially their defensive line — looked positively ‘07 and Eli Manning and his receivers again made huge plays when it counted in a demolition of the Atlanta Falcons.
• Oh and someone named Tim Tebow threw all over the best defense in the NFL as the Denver Broncos shocked the Pittsburgh Steelers in overtime of the weekend’s finale. You know, your normal, garden variety shocker.

This was one heavenly stiff arm by Demaryius Thomas, if I do say so myself.

And with that, Wildcard Weekend is in the books. Coincidentally, my playoff preview column is also in the books, and time has not been helpful to it in the least. Each of my four picks against the spread were wrong (maybe today is a good time to explain how I don’t bet on sports) and I led into them with an impassioned plea to retain public enemy number one to the Eagles 2011 Super Bowl hopes, none other than embattled defensive coordinator Juan Castillo.

Let’s ask Mr. Horse what he thinks about my last column.

(Me neither, Mr. Horse. Me neither. Also, a big thank you to Adio Royster for lending me that last joke.)

Luckily, the point of this column is not about my own prognosticative degeneration — feel free to have at it in the comments section at your own leisure — but instead to gripe about a few quirks in the way the NFL does its business.

1. Teams with better records should not be forced to travel to play teams with crappier records.

Did you know that the Sunday games featured 9-7 and 8-8 teams hosting 11-5 and 12-4 teams, respectively? Each won of course. That’s not to say that the Giants and Broncos wouldn’t have won those games on the road — well, maybe the Broncos — but the odds were clearly pushed in their favor by the home field advantage. (The Giants could have won in Atlanta with one arm tied around their collective backs based on the putrid Falcon showing.) The Giants and Broncos “earned” this right because no one else in their terrible divisions finished over .500. Good work, guys!

(Let’s not even talk about last year’s playoffs in which the 12-4 Saints traveled to Seattle to face the 7-9 Seahawks. Of course, we would not have been privy to last season’s Alpha Male Play of the Year. So I guess there are some positives to the way the NFL conducts its playoff seeding.)

2. Can we get rid of ALL inadvertent whistle calls?

Hey NFL, help the referees help themselves please!

For a maniacally successful league, the NFL does as good a job fixing its rules as Congress does before a holiday “recess”. I thought they fixed all of those inadvertent whistle calls a few seasons ago — incorrect. Luckily, for Broncos fans and Tebow lovers everywhere, that little blown call on the incomplete/lateral pass didn’t cost Denver the game yesterday.

Why do the members of the rules committees hamstring the referees with rules like these? Why, for instance, is a referee unable to overturn an obvious blown call because of a technicality when basically every player doesn’t even know that’s the case? I don’t know, and I know a lot of things. (For instance, I know that I am not always humble.)

3. New coaches shouldn’t be allowed to be hired during the playoffs for teams that are still alive.

This, of course, has to do with the hiring of Josh McDaniels in New England minutes after his former team, Denver, became the opponent. Granted, it shouldn’t matter anyway. On paper, the Patriots should handle the Broncos. Yet, the crafty Bill Belichick dialed up the old, hire one of your old employees before a big game with you trick. (I’m guess McDaniels wasn’t willing to part with his old practice video tapes without a job? ZING!)

I suppose with live in a free-market economy in this country, so I shouldn’t complain. Just leave it up to Belichick to look for every angle available in his disposal. Oh, I’d love to have him on my side…

That’s about it. I hope you enjoyed Wildcard Weekend!